Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
