i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize