im about as happy as oj after his trial
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize
