And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
