Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
