So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
