How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
No I am not eating basil off your cock
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
