Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
