just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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