If that was your dad, he is hot
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
