I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
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