The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
