yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
