I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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