I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
