So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
