Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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