I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
