Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
