just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
