She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
