Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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