erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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