you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
do herpes really smell.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
