If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize