i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
