This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
