I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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