Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
