How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
