Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
