Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
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