butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
