glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You work out of a Hotel?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize