omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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