You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
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