haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
