if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Someone shit on the floor
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
