found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
