She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
