all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
