I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
