Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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