Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
