So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Sext me about skeletons
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize