similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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