1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
