jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize