she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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