Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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